Ophthalmophobia

No, this is not some fancy medical term nor does it have anything to do with babies or pregnancy. Ophthalmophobia is the fear of being stared at.

Since I can remember I have always had issues with people staring at me. Its just rude. And I feel like the older I get, the more people stare and the longer their gaze lasts. I've tried to make it a game over the last couple years where I will stare back until I can say "I win". Then I make them feel uncomfortable like they made me.

Staring at things, staring at people has been part of the human experience for as long as we have been around. We stare for hours at little babies, at oceans or lakes, or at flickering firelight. We stare at roadside accidents as we drive by, trying to incorporate the threat of accident into our reality. We stare endlessly at animals, a favorite pet or a deer in the wild, for they are unselfconscious- their lack of awareness gives us license to stare all we want, for as long as we want. So how far does this license extend?

Now that I am pregnant ...

People look at me. They look at my belly. Look at my belly some more. Then they look away.

For people who know I am pregnant, I am completely fine with them looking because its only natural. However, when meeting with clients and being around people who I don't know personally - JUST ASK ME! Its not like I have ballooned up all over the place, so far only my belly has grown. Its now getting to the point where its pretty obvious I'm pregnant. I talk to these people and do they think I don't notice they are staring at my belly 97% of the time??? Seriously! One of my clients was being so rude I almost just bursted it out. Its kind of a hard topic to bring into conversation though .. "Ms. Smith, this is the Empire Ballroom, its 6,000 square feet big, I am pregnant.." No ... that doesn't really mesh well. This whole experience kind of makes me feel like I have the big boobs that I never had. I've never had issues with people not looking me in the eye until now.

At least now I can better grasp why people are staring at me... obviously, they are trying to figure out if I am pregnant. I still can't figure out what all the staring was about before. Luckily, I still have five months of freedom from my staring complex thanks to my baby! And then when Baby Murphy comes along ... everyone will stare at baby. Wow, looks like I am all set, problem solved. Ophthalmophobia cured!